Players and Plonkers: TV and porn edition

I'm a sucker for David and Goliath stories. Tales of the underdog that stood up to the big guy will always catch my eye, and this week's Player of the Week is no exception.

Maori TV are standing their ground against officials from the Chinese Embassy, who are unhappy the station is planning to air a documentary about a leader of the Uighur people, an ethnic group from the Xinjiang region of China which has been pushing for independence since 1933.

The documentary's caused a stir around the world, including at the recent Melbourne International Film Festival where there were protests about its inclusion. Websites have been hacked over this film and diplomatic relations strained.

The Chinese view is that Rebiya Kadeer, the subject of the film, is linked to "terrorist groups" and that "the content of the film distorted facts about China's policies regarding treatment of ethnic minorities".

But Maori TV aren't budging. When Chinese diplomats asked to meet with them in an effort to have the broadcast axed, they said no - but offered them a chance to state their position on air and explain to New Zealand why they didn't want the film to air. The diplomats declined.

This is in sharp contrast to Auckland City Council, who in recent years have bowed to diplomatic pressure from China over the banned Falun Gong movement. Bureaucrats were asked not to attend a concert performance put on by Falun Gong supporters - and they capitulated.

The documentary is screening on September 1 at 8.30pm. I'll be watching. So good on you, Maori TV - not only do you provide a whole bunch of quality docos that other stations don't, but you also stand up for freedom of speech.


Plonker of the Week has to go to Steve Crow, the porn "king" and organiser of the controversial Boobs on Bikes parades. I don't know if he still gets to be called "king" when several of his companies have been put into liquidation (and their assets transferred so creditors can't get hold of them), but in any case he hit headlines again this week after he offered the New Zealand Breast Cancer Foundation $7,500 and they declined.

Crow's deal was that he'd donate $5000 to the charity if 100 women would participate in next month's parade, and another $2500 if 100 men also went topless.

Okay, that's a generous offer. But the foundation's response was firstly that they hadn't heard anything from Crow about his pledge, and secondly that they weren't keen on endorsing or accepting money from his event.

It seems likely to me that this is exactly what Crow was hoping for - because now he gets to act all affronted, demanding to know why the charity would turn down much-needed money, and basically accusing them of not caring about the women of New Zealand. Cue press releases, media attention and (he hopes) increased attendance at Boobs on Bikes.

Because what does Boobs on Bikes actually exist to promote? Crow's Erotica expo, which always starts the day after the parade. And which is one of his businesses that just went into liquidation? Erotica Expo (renamed Malibu Media since he put it into liquidation).

Crow is now planning to donate proceeds from the event to a US-based charity supporting victims of female genital mutilation, so hopefully some good will come of the parade, which is otherwise usually a pretty lacklustre affair. Bored business types and students who thank their stars they were in the right place at the right time, having a quick ogle at a bunch of women who are being carted about with their tops off despite the harsh spring weather. It's entirely unspectacular.

Certainly some might say that the Breast Cancer Foundation should be happy to accept any and all money offered to them, regardless of where it comes from, because at the end of the day they need money to help cancer sufferers and beggars can't be choosers. Crow has also pointed out that they accept money sourced from alcohol and gambling (the Lion Foundation and Sky City), so why should money raised in a topless parade be unacceptable?

I say beggars can be choosers. If Steve Crow wanted to make a donation privately, quietly and without fanfare, he could have. But he's chosen to go about it in a flashy, tacky way and the charity are well within their rights to say thanks, but no thanks - we'd prefer not to be associated with you.


And this week's bonus award for most Perplexing PhD topic goes to Heidy Kikillus, a Victoria University student who's been devoting considerable amounts of research to our turtle problem, using TradeMe. Didn't know we had a turtle problem? Neither did I, but it turns out the pets many Kiwi kids own are classified as an invasive species and can be dangerous to our ecosystem if they escape.

Enter Heidy, who's been trawling the Lost and Found section on TradeMe and monitoring which areas the runaway reptiles tend to frequent.

"I've found out that lost turtle reports on TradeMe tend to cluster around cities - particularly Auckland," she says.

I really hope this is a case of poor science reporting, and that Ms Kikillus' thesis actually involves a whole lot more than just browsing TradeMe for missing pets, because I could have told you that there would be more cases of lost turtles around areas of larger population and I stopped taking science (or geography, for that matter) after fifth form.

Who are your Players and Plonkers for this week?