On Sunday's '90 Day Fiancé: Before the 90 Days', Amanda admitted she was skeptical Razvan could be the provider she was looking for since his life's dream has been to become an actor
On Sunday's episode, the couple dealt with the aftermath of what might be their biggest fight yet. The two have had a rocky few days — in last week's episode, Amanda came to the conclusion that "maybe he's not the type of man" she's looking for.
Razvan struggled to bounce back after the exchange, sharing in a confessional interview: "I really thought that the last two days, me and Amanda we are building a stronger relationship and everything is OK. But last night was the worst night of my life. I never argue with no one in my life like this, and that was really hurtful for me."
He continued, "It's really hard for me to accept that it's over, because I love her very much and I want to make this relationship work. But I don't know if this will be possible."
When Razvan attempted to talk things through with Amanda the next morning, he admitted that her words had "really hurt me." He pleaded with her to share her "true feelings" about the state of their relationship.
Amanda — who's a single mother to two young children whose husband, Jason, died of cancer just months prior — responded that even thoupgh she cared deeply him, she had concerns about whether he'd be able to provide for their family while pursuing his dreams to become an actor.
"Obviously, I care about you and I love you," she said. "But I think that, like, we're just different ... for one, I feel like you won't do anything to, like, provide for your family. Like, would you be a janitor to make some money while you're pursuing an acting career?"
Amanda added that she was worried she would end up having to "take care of" him if he were to move from his native Romania to her home in the U.S. Razvan quickly rebutted this, claiming he didn't need her money and had "too much" pride to ask for anything.
"You think you need a guy who has stability, you know, like, a guy how Jason was," he said, getting heated. "Last night you compared me with Jason. But it's not fair for you to tell me now. I told you from the beginning who I am. I told you I want someone that [will] support me with what I want to do in this life."
Amanda acknowledged that it wasn't fair to him and said that she didn't want to hurt him. Still, she couldn't shake her doubts.
"After Jason, I wanted you to be the right person," she said. "But maybe we're just not right for each other."
Razvan then teared up and cried that he didn't understand what he did wrong. Amanda admitted that maybe she was simply "scared to be in a relationship." She explained that it was scary for her to try to move on and start a new life with someone else after being widowed and that maybe she was just trying to "make excuses" for them to break up.
"I feel like I'm lost and confused and sad and heartbroken," Razvan said in a confessional interview. "I don't really know if me and Amanda, we are together or we are breaking up. But I feel like, in this moment I did everything I could do for this relationship and ... it's just too much."
Later in the episode, Razvan and Amanda attempted to talk things out during the car ride. Although he was exhausted emotionally, he insisted that he "100 percent" still wanted to make their relationship work.
Amanda also seemed to have taken on a new perspective. "Waking up this morning, I definitely felt like I was going to end things," she said in an interview. "But I am realizing my past trauma and my grief may have caused issues in our relationship. And it was wrong for me to compare him to Jason. I know that I love Razvan and I wanna be with him."
She admitted that "in a normal or ideal relationship," things between the two of them would be "amazing," but the circumstances with her grief ultimately complicated everything. She told Razvan that she also didn't want to break up and that she loved him.
Razvan was initially hesitant to forgive, but eventually agreed to continue to try to work through their issues.
"I feel like a part of me is really want[ing] to end this relationship, but it's hard letting go [of] Amanda," he admitted. "Even if I'm not sure that I want to break up with her, it is like something in me shut down."
Amanda noticed his cold behavior and expressed worry that he was slipping away. Getting emotional, she told producers that she felt like Razvan was her "second love."
"I don't want to lose that," she said. "I don't want to let him go."
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90 Day Fiancé: Before the 90 Days airs Sundays at 8 p.m. ET on TLC.
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