P Diddy cancelled his 50th birthday celebration twice because he missed his late ex Kim Porter.
The 'I'll Be Missing You' rapper - whose real name is Sean Combs - celebrated his milestone birthday with a star-studded bash at his Beverly Hills mansion over the weekend, but has now admitted he called off the event "two times" in the run up to the big day, because he couldn't see himself celebrating without Kim.
Kim passed away suddenly on November 15 last year due to pneumonia, and although Diddy turned 50 last month on November 4, he didn't feel ready to host his party until over a month later.
He said: "I canceled the party two times because I just couldn't see myself partying for my 50th birthday without [Kim].
"I wasn't feeling it. I didn't want to be fake. I wanted to be at a point of strength."
Diddy rescheduled his party for December 14, which would have been Kim's 49th birthday, and said the event was "one of the most authentic nights" of his life.
He added to People magazine: "I thought, 'I can have a party with Kim and we can party together.' It worked out beautifully. It was probably one of the most authentic nights of love that I ever experienced. I'm blessed."
The party was attended by the likes of power couples Jay Z and Beyonce and Kim Kardashian West and Kanye West, as well as Hollywood actor Leonardo DiCaprio.
Guests were invited to the party with an audio message from supermodel Naomi Campbell, who told partygoers: "You're invited to Diddy's 50th birthday party ... only come with dancing shoes and good vibes."
And one guest admits the whole thing got quite "emotional".
They said: "It was an emotional evening. [Gospel singer] Marvin Sapp sang Puffy's favourite spiritual song, 'Never Would Have Made It.' Puffy got real emotional."