Opening up on the most recent episode of her Whine Down podcast, the 37-year-old country singer said it still stung to see her 34-year-old ex-husband cozy up to other women when they bumped into each other at a bar opening in Nashville earlier this month.
"I will say that was really hard to see him there — seeing him flirt with other girls," Kramer said. "I mean, granted, I was there as well doing my thang, but that was really hard."
"You know what was hard? It looked so easy for him," she explained. "He didn't look like it bothered him one second. And that hurt, because I was like, 'He's untamed, he's uncaged and he's happy.' "
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Kramer first announced that she and Caussin were splitting after six years of marriage in April, with the divorce finalized in July. The One Tree Hill alum and the former NFL player share daughter Jolie Rae, 5½, and son Jace Joseph, 2½.
Jason Bihler Jana Kramer and Jay Cutler with guests
At one point during the bar opening – where Kramer and Cutler were photographed together for the first time – the "Beautiful Lies" singer said she and her ex spoke, but Caussin's reaction to seeing her in public wasn't quite what she had hoped for.
"I was like, 'This is awkward!' And he's like 'Not at all!' " she said on her podcast "Like, I'm glad that he was fine with it. But at the same time — I talked to my therapist about it and was kind of like 'Just a little piece of me was kind of like, it would have been nice to be like, 'Yeah this is hard but I'm glad we can be cordial.' That's just acknowledgment that it might hurt a little. But I don't know."
The star said she and her therapist also talked about coming to terms with the situation in the moment, which wasn't easy.
"What kept coming to my mind was 'How did I get here? How is my ex-husband across the room?' " she said. "Like, how did I get here?"
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"It wasn't that I wanted to be next to him," she clarified. "It's not even that I still have feelings. I mean, none of those things are back because I don't want to be back in that relationship. That was a bad, toxic relationship. But what I thought it was and the memories, I'm like, 'How did I get here?' It was very strange."
As she moves on, a source told PEOPLE that Kramer and Cutler, 38, clicked from the start.
"Jay and Jana had a lot they bonded over with how their divorces played out," an insider said earlier this month.