Kerry Katona has "some kind of eating disorder".
The 41-year-old star is currently recovering after undergoing breast reduction surgery, but as soon as she's fully healed, she's preparing to check into a retreat to address her feelings of self-loathing and tackle her unhealthy relationship with food.
She said: "As soon as I’m healed from my operation, I’m going to Homefield Grange Retreat in Northampton. It’s all about mindfulness – meditation and yoga – and also healthy eating.
"It’s not hardcore bootcamp, but I just want to feel better about myself. I’m feeling really motivated because I’ve felt so s**t recently. I’ve been in tears over my relationship with food. I have real issues.
"For example, the other day I bought a kebab and I hid on my own and binged on it. I’ll eat food, and then I’ll feel like I want to be sick. I definitely have some kind of eating disorder."
Kerry - who has five children from previous relationships - is feeling so low about her appearance, she doesn't even want to see her fiance, fitness trainer Ryan Mahoney.
She added in her column for new! magazine: "I hate the way I look – I don’t even want Ryan to see me at the moment. I feel so insecure. I’m not sure why I feel like this. I don’t know if it’s because of my age, or if it’s because Ryan’s younger than me, or if it’s because I’m in the media.
"I need to do something about it. I want to get back in touch with therapists, The Speakmans, to see if they can help."
At the moment, Kerry is staying with her mother, Sue Katona, to recover from her operation and also to keep her mum company while she recuperates after her recent heart attack.
She said: "I’m currently recovering from my breast reduction surgery. My boobs are so much smaller now! It’s a lot to get used to, but I’m very happy. I feel like I’ve lost about 2st in weight.
"I’ve been staying at my mum’s for the past week as I needed to properly rest and just be in bed, but I’ll be going back home soon. I’ve missed the kids so much!
"It’s nice being with my mum, especially after her heart attack. I think she wanted me to stay with her longer but it will be good for her to get used to being on her own again. She’s also recovering really well.
"She’s completely stopped smoking now – and I’m so proud of her. After 50 years of smoking, it’s an incredible achievement."