Amy Robach Reflects on 'Crippling' Worries About Death She Had After Breast Cancer Diagnosis: 'That Fear Is Real'
"You’re still wondering about how much time you have left," boyfriend T.J. Holmes said on the latest episode of their podcast
Amy Robach knows how scary it can be to face death.
On Tuesday's episode of the Amy and T.J. Podcast — her show with boyfriend T.J. Holmes — the former Good Morning America anchor reflected on the worries she felt after she was diagnosed with Stage II breast cancer in October 2013.
Her remarks came as she and Holmes spoke with Tim Whittaker and Valley Collins, survivors of the "Miracle on the Hudson," on the 15th anniversary of the incident.
“I really appreciate your honesty and your transparency,” Robach, 50, said. “Because when the unthinkable happens —when the thing that is almost impossible, actually happens to you — that fear is real. And fear is a powerful thing.”
“When people say, ‘'Oh, what are the chances?’ You can say, ‘Actually, if it’s less than 1%, if it happens to you, it’s everything. It’s 100%,' " she stressed. "And living then your life, knowing that your greatest fear could actually happen, is crippling in moments."
The "Miracle on the Hudson" occurred on Jan. 15, 2009 when Capt. Chesley "Sully" Sullenberger III heroically made an emergency landing on the Hudson River after the plane he was piloting, US Airways Flight 1549, struck a flock of birds shortly after takeoff, losing all engine power
All 155 passengers onboard were saved, but as Whittaker and Collins told Robach and Holmes, they feared for the worst.
Hearing about their near-death experience helped put things into perspective for Holmes, 46. He said on the podcast Tuesday that that — as well as Robach’s breast cancer scare — have had an impact on his outlook on life.
“You all help me, everybody I’m sitting here with,” he told Robach, Whittaker and Collins.
Related: T.J. Holmes and Amy Robach Reveal They Had a 'Disagreement' That Nearly Ended Their Relationship
Robach learned about her diagnosis after she had a mammogram live on GMA. She had a double mastectomy and eight rounds of chemotherapy, before her final round of treatment in April 2014.
Though it's been 8 years, Robach, Holmes said, "thought she was going to die" when she was diagnosed and still relives that fear "every 6 months," when she gets checkups. "You’re still wondering about how much time you have left," Holmes said to Robach.
That left Holmes wondering about fate.
“Maybe all three of you have got to help me understand here," he said. "Who chalks that up to just coincidence? ... I’ve got more into later in my life about the universe giving you signs. There are signs out there... But how do you make sense of, ''I’m not supposed to be here?' "
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Whittaker was quick to respond. “I can’t explain it either — and probably nor can any of us, about why did this happen or what if? That kind of thinking is a lost cause," he noted. "But what we can say is, 'Well, I am still here and what more purposeful, meaningful impact can I have on the lives of those that are most close to me and depend upon me?' "
"For me, at least, I’ve tried to be a better parent and spouse and brother and son to my parents. So trying to be that better individual," h said. "But, more importantly, I’ve become much more influential as a mentor in other folks’ lives that are going through challenging circumstances. I’ve found a lot of reward and satisfaction in that — in trying to help others navigate their circumstances, which seems maybe traumatic at the time."
He joked, "I can always say, ‘Yeah, but you weren’t in a plane crash!’ ”
After speaking with Whittaker and Collins, Holmes and Robach said they “couldn’t imagine” communicating with each other for the last time.
“I’m still fascinated,” Holmes said on the podcast about the crash. “I can’t imagine [Collins’] husband … the text, ‘My plane is crashing.’ She says she sent him that message as they were going down.”
“I can’t imagine getting that type of message from you,” he told Robach.
“I hope to never send one like that, T.J.,” Robach responded before jokingly adding “That’ll be on my list of goals of things not to do.”
“Put a sweet emoji next to it," Holmes suggested with a laugh. "Maybe it’ll lighten it."
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