Boris Johnson 'humiliated' not to be targeted in honey-trap scandal
Boris Johnson’s North American tour continues. After a stop-off in Canada where he pooh-poohed Rishi Sunak’s anti-smoking plans, he moved on to Washington yesterday. At a Georgetown Q&A he told a paying audience that a return to frontline politics from his “blameless, rustic obscurity” is “unlikely”. When a Politico reporter asked Johnson, pictured, if he had been targeted in the Westminster honey-trap scandal, he replied: “Not yet! Rather humiliating, nobody has bothered.”
Saatchi’s Orgasm doesn’t hit the heights
He was credited, along with his brother Charles, with winning Margaret Thatcher her first election after the “Labour Isn’t Working” poster campaign. But advertising mogul Maurice Saatchi, Baron Saatchi, 77, has had an eclectic career ever since (museum trustee, Tory politician, professional snob). His latest project is another new departure: a 220-page book titled Orgasm.
It’s about orgasms “of the mind”, rather than the body, which Old Maurice describes as “that divine moment of revelation for which we wait and pray”. He goes on to tell in detail about his shocking and irreverent views on everything from taxes to customer service telephone lines (he finds it annoying when put on hold). With a low, low price of just £100, such insights can be yours at around 45p per page. It seems the title is the most interesting thing about this book. What would Mrs T think?
Marquess of Queensberry aka Karate Kid
At the grand old age of 94, the Marquess of Queensberry still has his chops. While walking down the Harrow Road late at night recently, the aristocrat and former Sixties party boy was approached by a mugger who asked, in a short-tempered way, for all of his money. Rather than surrendering his purse and valuables, the Marquess tells the Londoner he fought off his attacker using the power of Jiu Jitsu! While his family invented the Queensberry Rules of boxing back in the days of Queen Victoria, on this occasion he eschewed the upper cut in favour of the front foot sweep. He puts his fitness down to 30 push-ups a day and an interest in self-defence. A lesson to thugs looking to prey on the elderly.
Who has the tools to lead the country?
Our friends at the New Statesman have described it as “one of the most revealing surveys to come out this year”, so where do you stand on the all-important question of who would be better at putting up a shelf, Keir Starmer or Rishi Sunak? Just 13 per cent of Brits polled said they would trust the PM with the job over the Labour leader. In fairness, Starmer might have heritable advantage with DIY since his father Rodney was, he keeps telling us, a tool-maker.