Mom decides to do ‘nothing around the house’ to put her husband in his place
You know that whole “default parent” thing? Yeah, well, it’s not just kids’ needs that get defaulted to one parent more often than the other. Things like housework, errands, juggling calendars, and more usually get defaulted to that same parent.
After her husband accused her of “doing nothing around the house,” one mom goes on strike to show just how much “nothing” she really does.
Connecticut mother of two, Lindsay Donnelly, shared her exact predicament in a now-viral TikTok. She basically decided to take a full hiatus from being the family housekeeper after her husband had the audacity to complain about the cleanliness and order of their home.
Donnelly tells PEOPLE that the typical stress of being parents with two little kids was getting between her and her husband when he made a “totally spontaneous” dig at her about doing “nothing” around the house.
“It wasn’t an ongoing fight. It’s more of the day-to-day ‘keeping a house in order with two working parents and two little kids’ conversation,” she tells PEOPLE.
So yeah, she pumped the breaks. On all of it. Cleaning up the kitchen, laundry, picking up after everyone, etc. Donnelly essentially went on strike. Because sometimes men (in This Author’s opinion) need a literal wake-up call with their own eyeballs to see exactly why they’re so very wrong. Also? Keeping up with the multiple daily messes of a four-year-old and seven-year-old (as a mom who has one of each) is no easy feat.
“That morning I was kind of p*ssed at my husband and my daughter was in the room, and I make the beds every day. It’s like habit for me. She was in there with me while I was making the bed. And then I stopped myself and said, ‘You know what?’ and unmade the bed.”
“And she asked, ‘What are you doing?’ and I said, ‘Mommy’s not doing any housework.'”
As for her husband, well, he was none the wiser until the internet began chiming in and the video took off.
“I don’t know if he even realized until I told him,” she says. “He was just annoyed the house is messy.”
Instead of cleaning, Donnelly had a girls’ night with her friends—can we get a slow clap going in the chat for this woman please?
“I went out with my girlfriends the night before I made the TikTok and I was telling them how I was literally doing nothing around the house and we were all kind of laughing about it,” she says.
Naturally, when a video goes viral, it’s subject to plenty of commentary from strangers online. While Donnelly’s video was brief and certainly didn’t add the full context of her spat with her husband, internet commenters were still quick to tell her to get divorced. (Look, we can acknowledge what he said is crappy without sending this woman contact info for divorce lawyers and alimony tips.)
“I want to make more content about this. I feel like Brian and I have a good relationship and we can make fun of ourselves, even in our weak moments and I think that that’s helpful. It’s reality and comedy at the same time,” she explains. “I really hope to make more content that resonates with people in a way that doesn’t make people think we should get a divorce.”
A version of this article was published in June 2023. It has been updated.